A few weeks ago I read a quote that someone shared from the Music book in the Mother’s Learning Library about concentration. It really stood out to me. I wrote about it here.
Then a few days later, in looking for an entirely different quote in the Catch the Vision book, I stumbled across another quote referencing the music book.
“After listening quietly and hearing inwardly there comes an inner sense of harmony. The chaos of vagrant thoughts is calmed into repose; the mind is stilled to outside influences and becomes a reflector of the inner light which comes only through stillness. Thoughts become positive, ideas are born, and one dares to dream of great accomplishments, and through the stillness comes the thought, “I can and I will.” Those things which seemed beyond reach come quite naturally within the realm of possibility. Faith in our own powers is built up when the chaotic thoughts of the outside world are stilled… Dreams and ideals which have been vague take on definite form, shaping themselves under the influence of that harmony which has been established through listening. The scriptures of all countries lay great stress on stillness, and every great philosopher has given days and nights to silent meditation. What better technique could anyone have than the power to retire to an inner sanctuary, there to obtain the right answer to any problem? … [Singing and listening] has developed this power in many a child, so that they have had the capacity to still their minds and really listen to guidance which has saved their lives and brought them happiness… Imagine, then, a form of general education by which each person became convinced that within himself was the ‘meeting place with God,’ with harmony and order? During the last few years, all of us have realized that our hectic living is wrong—rushing madly from one thing to another, asking questions and not stopping long enough to hear the answer, dragging our children from one lesson to another, and then surfeiting them with all sorts of artificial amusements. All of this seems like a game invented to prevent anyone from pausing to think. Have we really come to this, that our state of mind is too undesirable to be allowed a moment’s chance in which to register? Music is a language—the greatest of all languages, since it can say that which no words can ever convey.” (page 139-140)
Both of these led me to pick up the music book and start reading the back section “What Music Can Do for You.” I’m still in the middle of reading it but I have had so many impressions come to me as I’ve read and pondered. Too many to share here. These thoughts about music were combined with thoughts about imagination, thoughts about attention and thoughts about gardens (a topic that has been in the forefront of my mind for the past several months as I have been designing and creating my dream garden). Because there are so many layers to how these topics relate to my own personal life experiences at the moment, I don’t think that I can completely convey in this post what I would love to share. Hopefully some of this makes a little bit of sense and resonates with someone. The gist of it is that some recent physical health things have led me to discover/recognize some attributes about myself and in the process, certain challenges in my life have begun to make more sense and I have felt guidance from God in a direction to move towards wholeness for myself as a unique individual.
I would call myself a visionary, a dreamer. I love to uphold ideals and stretch towards them, seeking to create a beautiful life in reality.
I resonate with these words from one of Daria’s youtube videos: “If I really had to have one resolution written somewhere in the depth of my journal for this year, or for the rest of my life even, it would be this: living meaningfully, completely immersed in the present moment, surrounding myself with beauty, telling magical stories through my lense, and everyday taking a small step forward into life so extraordinary.” (Daria, Poetry of Slow Life, The Art of an Ordinary Life)
But I often feel stuck and the vision in my head often feels elusive, hard to grasp, hard to realize. I could be in just the right place, doing the right thing, but often my thoughts and anxieties inside my head can get in the way and keep me from experiencing the rest and joy that I know is available, but feels just outside my reach. My life circumstances could be beautiful and “perfect,” I could have everything I’ve dreamed of, but yet I could still find myself feeling empty more often than I would like. It’s like I am standing outside the wall of the secret garden. I know that something incredible lies just beyond that wall but I don’t know how to get in and access it. The garden is hidden and enclosed for a reason. That is what makes it possible for it to be a sacred and special place. Even finding the door took a lot of time and searching. It was hidden behind a lot of ivy. I knew where the entrance was now, but the door was locked. Now I would have to go find the key.
I know that sustained attention and appreciation are vital to real joy. This is how we connect with God. This is the door. But sometimes this feels forced for me, like I am going through the motions, but not able to really *feel* the joy of the experience. I am standing at the door but it’s locked.
I have realized recently through learning about emotional playgrounds (Dr. Neufeld) that I sometimes struggle to really *feel* because my nervous system gets overloaded/overstimulated more easily/quickly than average (highly sensitive person) and my brain can jump into fight or flight. When I am in this state, I can’t really feel, not fully. I am in a state of overwhelm and reaction, not digestion and response. Feeling is a luxury that my brain can’t afford when it’s already overloaded and under stress.
In my learning over the past few weeks, I realized that the key to the secret garden (for me) is music. Music calms my nervous system, puts me back in harmony and tune with the Spirit, and opens my heart. It motivates and draws out my emotions and helps me to be able to really feel. Music focuses my attention. Music inspires my imagination.
I have been including music in my days way more lately. Especially instrumental music. I curate the music to the mood/moment. And when it’s not playing, I have found myself “listening” to music in my mind, humming something to myself, or singing. Throughout my day (especially when the music is on) I have been using my imagination, attention, and appreciation to picture moments from my life as part of a movie montage. It’s amazing how much I am better able to feel the beauty of these moments when I do this.
And as I continue to create the life that I want to live, I have been jotting down notes in my phone of my little experiences and then putting little splotches of paint onto a paint by number canvas for each experience, as a visual reminder to myself that “by small and simple things are great things brought to pass”.
- I got a custom paint by number kit of this painting that has become so meaningful to me
Paying attention to the tiny details of the painting reminds me to pay attention to the tiny details of my life. Each day more of the beauty of the whole is revealed. As I paint, I listen to my phone reading these experiences back to me and it feels as if I am reading a letter from a friend telling about beautiful experiences from her life… only that life is actually mine. And all of this brings deep feelings of gratitude to my heart and mind.
Harmony, attention, appreciation, imagination.
All of these things inspired me to write this poem and make this video that I thought I would share with you…
Key to the Secret Garden
I knew there was a garden;
I found the covered wall.
I longed to go inside;
The mystery did enthrall.
Something hidden here,
Behind ivy I could see,
The secret garden door,
But couldn’t find the key.
Searched long and hard,
Sometimes felt close,
Elusive dream,
The quest engrossed.
Then one day I found it.
The robin’s song gave clue.
It had been there all along;
There, right before my view.
The key was music.
The door unlocked.
Stepped through the gate,
No longer blocked.
…………………………
Seeking a beautiful world,
The music starts to play;
The calm distills as dew,
I feel my heart give way.
As the soundtrack fills the space,
A portal I’ve crossed through,
Imagination awakened,
I find the world anew.
Rhythm, harmony, melody,
Hope, faith, vision music gives.
The message sinks into my soul,
Create the life I wish to live.
Beauty formerly disguised,
Is now so clear before my eyes.
Beauty yet desired,
The prospect is acquired.
Unexplainable power,
Music uplifts, elevates,
A beautiful world awaits;
I am inspired to go create.
…………………………
The garden is abundant life,
The life I long to live.
It’s right here before me now,
When attention I give.
A life connected to Divinity,
Joy multiplied by infinity.
Rose colored glasses,
Put them on my eyes.
Imagination roused,
The beauty will surprise.
Beauty in the details,
Life’s mundane tasks,
Music helps me see,
The glory is unmasked.
Ordinary moments,
Magnificence uncovered,
Extraordinary moments,
Joy of creation discovered.
Some gardens are built;
Some gardens are found;
Both planted and nurtured,
Bountiful harvests abound.
Romanticize my life,
The beauty all surrounds,
Look with awe and wonder;
Rich miracles are found.
I soak in life’s moments,
A deeply moving montage,
Each scene paints a picture,
An incredible collage.
A couple days after finishing this poem and video I continued reading in the Music book and read this quote and it goes along perfectly with attention being the door and music being the key:
“The majority of us have only sensations where we should have experiences – vivid, clear, easily recalled, and reimagined experiences – with which we may change the dark times of fear and worry into times of beauty, harmony, and peace. This is truly the function of music, but we cannot have this power without paying the price of a little time and attention.”
